Giving birth - what to (really!) expect

Before too long, the wait will be over & you’ll meet your baby. Here’s the inside track on what you can expect from childbirth

baby

Ah, delivery day. You’ve heard a million scare stories, old wives’ tales and seen one too many dramatic labour scenes in the movies. But listen, it needn’t be as daunting as you think. As Caroline, 39, a mum of one from Manchester, says: “Ahead of due date, I was terrified that I’d never be able to cope with contractions, that it would take days, that things would never be the same down there again. In the end, giving birth was way more bearable than I’d anticipated.”

First stage of labour

What to expect? 

Say hello to contractions, which gradually open up your cervix ready for baby delivery. This is usually the longest stage and there are two parts. “The latent phase is when the cervix becomes soft and thin and begins to open to prepare for giving birth. This can last a few hours to a few days,” says Virginia Beckett, consultant obstetrician and gynaecologist and Royal College of Obstetricians and Gynaecologists spokesperson. At this time, contractions are irregular and can feel like dull, period-like pains. “Try to rest and if you feel like food, eat little and often – high-energy foods such as bananas, energy bars or toast and honey work well,” says Boots Parenting Club midwife, Emma Mills. “Once contractions are regular – roughly every five minutes, lasting 60 seconds – and the cervix has dilated beyond 3cm, or once your waters have broken, this is the active phase. The cervix would dilate at least 0.5cm per hour during this phase, to full dilatation, or 10cm,” adds Virginia. Once contractions are regular, you’ll really have to breathe through them – and it’s time to call your maternity unit!

Any interventions? 

“In hospital, if there are concerns about the length of labour, you’ll be assessed to determine the baby's condition and position,” says Virginia. “Contractions can be encouraged with an oxytocin drip.” If you’re struggling with pain once you’re in established labour, take heart – there’s plenty that can help. “Some women find relief in the birthing pool or with a TENS machine, a small device which sends a mild electrical current to relieve pain. Other options include gas and air, a pethidine injection, or an epidural,” says Emma. Speak to your midwife about these options while you’re putting together your birth guide.

Tip for you: 

“During contractions try 7-11 breathing,” says Emma. “Breathe in for seven seconds and out for 11 seconds. If you’re finding that hard, breathe in for four seconds and out for eight seconds.”

Tip for your birth partner: 

Download an app for timing your contractions – try Full Term (available on Android and iOS). “Time contractions from the start of one to the beginning of the next,” says Emma.

Second stage of labour

What to expect? 

Your cervix is fully dilated and baby begins to move down through your vaginal canal. “You may not feel an urge to push immediately – this is called the passive second stage. The active second stage is when there is an urge to push with most contractions and it concludes when your baby is born,” says Virginia. “Birth is expected to happen within three hours of active pushing in women having their first baby and often within two hours for those who have had previous births.”

Any interventions? 

“Sometimes mums get really tired at this stage or things may be going on a bit longer, so we may look to give you a helping hand with an instrumental delivery using either forceps or a ventouse,” explains Emma. Forceps are like large metal spoons which are curved to fit around your baby’s head, while a ventouse attaches to baby’s head by suction.

Tip for you: 

“When you begin to feel the urge to push, listen to your midwife’s advice,” says Emma. “Listen to when they tell you to push, when they tell you to ‘breathe’ and when to rest between the contractions. Your midwife will now be present with you in the room for the birth and until you and baby are settled.”

Tip for your birth partner: 

It’s all about reassurance right now. “When you’re pushing, eye contact and hand-holding calms and grounds you,” says Emma.

Third stage of labour

What to expect? 

Hurrah! Your baby is here, now it’s time to deliver your placenta and there are two ways to do it – naturally or through active management. “If there are no issues with you or baby, you can deliver your placenta naturally. It’s not as painful as baby delivery but it can take up to an hour,” says Emma.

Any interventions? 

You might prefer to have what’s known as “active management” where you’re given an oxytocin injection to speed up delivery of the placenta. “It’s totally up to you but if there are any issues with you or baby, the injection is advised,” says Emma.

Tip for you: 

“Consider how you wish to deliver your placenta in your birth plan,” says Emma. “Obviously you need to be flexible on the day, but do chat to your midwife about it in advance.”

Tip for your birth partner: 

“It’s helpful if they know where everything is in your hospital bag and get clothes ready for baby,” says Emma. “You’ll usually be checked over to see if you need any stitches and baby will be weighed. If your partner has any questions or concerns they just need to ask and someone will talk them through.”